Scott enters the room, wearing only a fine silken robe, and steps across his bear skin rug to his solid oak, handcrafted German desk. He sits in his leather chair and sips upon the Brazilian cappuccino resting next to his vintage 1920′s typewriter. Then he pours a glass of brandy and sips from that as well. Followed by pouring some white wine and sipping that as well. Then he realizes that it’s only eight in the morning, so he takes another sip of cappuccino. He hears the telephone ringing, but can’t see the phone as it’s buried underneath several Charles Dickens novels and a few copies of The New Yorker. It’s probably just Harvard asking if he wants to teach that philosophy class again (rolls eyes). There’s no time, he has a film review to write! As he lowers the needle onto his Beethoven vinyl, he takes a deep breath. He aligns his fingers above the typewriter keys as he is about to make beautiful art… He is about to open eyes… He is about to change lives… He is about to criticize film.
“You don’t have to be BRAINDEAD to realize that Warm Bodies is a BITING satire on teens in love. There will be GRAVE consequences if you choose to miss out on this FLESH new comedy. Of CORPSE you could choose to watch its STIFF competition instead, but you won’t have as BLOODY a good time. Don’t DECAY, it’s to DIE for.”
3 out of 4 Skulls
(gets up from chair, leaves house, goes on a four day peppermint schnapps bender)