How to Out-Quote a Guy Who Quotes ‘Walden’ on His Facebook Wall

walden

So I recently became Facebook friends with a guy I didn’t know, but had noticed that he existed because he went to high school with my fiance, so I’d see him on her news feed.  He’s a musician type who is always posting awesome ramblings, and TONS of inspirational quotes from books and dead people in order to show off his deep side.  So, I basically needed a guy like this as a Facebook friend, just so I could get the full experience and comment on his great stuff.  I mean, none of my other friends post things like this during the Grammy Awards:

DonnyWolf_01I KNOW, RIGHT?  Anyway, last night I noticed he posted a quote from Henry David Thoreau’s Walden.  To which I simply replied with a counter quote.

DonnyWolf_02

And then he deleted my comment!  Which actually isn’t that surprising, he’s deleted some of my comments before, because he doesn’t like people being silly on his super deep Facebook wall.  So I just thought I’d replace the comment with a new one and see if he finally leaves it up there.  I thought you wanted people to be intellectual with you!

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Deleted that one too.  Maybe this time I’ll go with something more noticeably recognizable, and see if he leaves it.

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Deleted again.  I just want him to acknowledge my quotes!

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And again.  I’ll try something more matter-of-fact this time.

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Still with the censoring of his Walden quote.  I can keep this up, buddy.  I want you to experience *my* quoting power, too.

DonnyWolf_07

You don’t like Mad Libs?  Are you a robot?  Let’s see how you respond to literal jokes.

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He’s still just reading them and deleting them…  But I’ve got more, I read a lot of literature.

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OK, maybe it’s time to go meta on him, and see if he leaves this one up there.

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No?  Ok, I can go back to my A-material, if that’s better for you.

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Ugh, I’m running out of books to quote.  What else is near my desk?  Ah, here we go.

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Still with the deletes…  He *really* doesn’t want some guy ruining his spiritual message to his fans.  I respect that.

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Well, c’mon man.  You can’t just throw down a quote like this and not expect to get quoted back!

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OK, well, THIS might work.  I’ll just quote HIM.  I’ll copy and paste the status update he posted right before this one.

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Deleting your OWN quote…?  Now I’m getting sad…  I think I need to just quote my own personal thoughts to him.

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*Still* deleting it…?  I’m getting hurt feelings over here.

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OH FINALLY!  He sends me a direct message!

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“WHY IS HE RUINING MY WALDEN QUOTE???  WHYYYYYY?!  THE WORLD NEEDS TO HEAR THIS!!”  I’m sorry, man.  So I just had to reassure him that I’ve just been in it for Walden from the beginning.

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OK, he wins this quote-off.  I’ll just legitimately quote Walden like he hoped one of his other friends would have done, but never did.

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And as of right now, he hasn’t deleted that comment.  🙂

 

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2 thoughts on “How to Out-Quote a Guy Who Quotes ‘Walden’ on His Facebook Wall

  1. dinosaurboner says:

    So is this guy just a mouth breather trying to disguise himself? I’d like to know more about him. Would it be too much to put some gore pictures on his facebook? I can send you some…

    • scottodactyl says:

      In due time, yes. My end game is to have him defriend me, which apparently he never does to anyone, because he even savors negative attention. But not after I give him a long con. When he posts stupid things, I usually give him an all caps “EXACTLY!” or “THAT’S WHAT I WAS THINKING!” in order to stay in his good graces for when I give him hard trolls like this one.

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