Lazy Movie Review: Terminator Genisys

terminator genisys

Premise:  I saw this movie two weeks ago and haven’t had much time to write anything about it until now, but that has kind of confined my memory to basically remember it being a rehash of the first Terminator‘s plot, but then with more robots and stuff later on.  Also, cell phone app updates are bad and could lead to a nuclear wasteland where the survivors are being imprisoned by tyrannical robot overlords.  Remember that the next time you’re asked to update Angry Birds Seasons.

 

Pros:

-I mean, I was entertained and whatnot.  It didn’t bore me.

-The one mental note that I’ve really held on to since I watched it: there were SO MANY shots of people getting thrown through walls, or running through walls, or just being mean to walls.  The fake wall budget on this movie must have been insane.  This movie is going to put the owner of Jerry’s Drywall in Pasadena, CA’s kids through college.  I would watch, and hope to watch, a three-minute compilation of just the wall destruction in this movie on YouTube.  And that drywall exploding sound put through IMAX speakers…  So good.

-I’d say it’s better than Rise of the Machines (which I don’t mind) and Salvation (which I didn’t hate, but don’t want to watch again).  I want to say that it’s a nice compliment to the original two movies, but, I mean, I don’t even really remember what happened in the third and fourth one other than “lady terminator” and “Christian Bale”.  So, I will just assume that the alternate universes and time paradoxes will all work themselves out…  [slowly backs out of room]

-At least they didn’t force Arnold to say “Hasta La Vista, baby.”  Hey, they even tried to give him a new catchphrase to carry on to the 6th movie (“Theoretically.”).

-I liked the MRI machine gag.

-The new style of robot was pretty cool, I guess.

 

Cons:

-If you picked apart Jurassic World for the island’s bad cell phone reception, lack of gyroball override commands, and other small grievances to the point that you hated it; I don’t even want to know how you will react to the GIANT plot holes to pick apart in Genisys…  It’s not even stuff like “Hey, that car battery wouldn’t start after sitting there for so long…”, it’s more like “That character doesn’t have a very justifiable reason to even exist…”

-This movie has to have the most spoilery trailer in the history of spoilery trailers.  Way to undercut the tension of like three or four scenes because you gave away the mid-movie twist on every commercial you shoved in our faces, marketing department.

-I like Emilia Clarke as an actress on Game of Thrones.  I did not like Emilia Clarke as an actress in Terminator Genisys.

-I also don’t like having to spell it “Genisys” every time.

-I also don’t like Jai Courtney’s name.

-ALSO, Jai Courtney is basically Sam Worthington 2.0.  Ok, I had to look it up, Sam Worthington has been in 5 films I’ve never heard of since I last saw him in Wrath of the Titans in 2012.  So look forward to that prolific output eventually, Jai.  I’m not sure Suicide Squad is going to write your meal ticket for life.  PROVE ME WRONG.

-I don’t know whether J.K. Simmons was simply wasted in the role he was given, or if his character was just hokey and lame, or both?

-I feel like I already saw the same Golden Gate bridge action scene in Rise of the Planet of the Apes?  But with like, robots, instead of apes…?

-The 3D sucked.  I wish they could just release non-3D movies in IMAX like they used to.  I wish 3D would go away.  No one likes you anymore, 3D.  The only time I ever go into 3D movies nowadays is when the only show time convenient to me *happens* to be the crappy, expensive 3D show time.  AND TRUST ME, I FORK OVER THE EXTRA THREE DOLLARS BEGRUDGINGLY.

 

Final Thoughts:  It’s a movie that you can pay to see and you may or may not enjoy it.  You might not hate it, you probably won’t love it, but it has things you easily recognize and a bunch of explosions and gunfire.  It’s kind of a watchable middle ground between the successful nostalgia of Jurassic World (in my opinion it was successful) and the pointless exercise in trying to print money with a familiar concept like Poltergeist ’15.

7 out of 10; but will probably give it a second chance on HBO next year.

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2 thoughts on “Lazy Movie Review: Terminator Genisys

  1. bobchuck says:

    The movie was filmed in NOLA. I bet they have been getting real good at redoing walls in the post Katrina landscape… Also, Arnold often at at “The Rum House” like 4 blocks from my house. Saw him a few times. He had a big hummer with a Cali license plate. Wonder if he drove all the way or someone moved it for him to NOLA for the few months.

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