2019 Dino Bone Oscar Picks

Ya know, before I got into my picks, I was planning on throwing in some quick hit movie reviews to this post when I realized something…  I have literally seen zero movies in theaters from 2019!

I’ve been to the movie theater only twice since the new year and we saw Free Solo and Aquaman, which both came out last year.  I recently rented Bohemian Rhapsody, and that was, uh, ya know, a music biopic.  You can’t deny that.  I think the only movies I’ve seen that were actually released in 2019 were those Fyre Festival docs on Netflix/Hulu.

Meanwhile, I check my Fandango app every week and I’ve actively avoided Escape Room, Alita Battle Angel, Glass, The Kid Who Would Be King, The Upside, Miss Bala, Lego Movie 2, Cold Pursuit, What Men Want, A Dog’s Way Home, Happy Death Day 2U, Velvet Buzzsaw, and Isn’t It Romantic.

…Not off to a great start, 2019.

So let’s remember a year that actually released some watchable movies, and do these picks.  I didn’t do too good last year and tried to go with logic a bunch of times, maybe I’ll try to go with my gut this time.  And I haven’t eaten lunch yet, so my gut is hungry for victory.  Victory and pulled pork sandwiches.

This year I’ll try something new and also give my second guess choices, so I can look back and see how many times I should have actually went with my gut.

Best Picture:  Roma

Unpopular Opinion (?):  I didn’t like Roma all that much.  I appreciated the good filmmaking and nice details throughout; while simultaneously wishing it would just freaking end already.  However, this year has one of the weakest group of Best Picture noms in a while (in my opinion), and if I were personally handing out the award, I’d only give it to BlacKkKlansman or The Favourite.  But c’mon.  Those aren’t going to win.  Last year they gave Best Picture to a movie about the lady who has sex with a fish man, so they have to even out the cosmos and give it to something kind of boring this year.  Roma is the perfect level of boring.

SECOND GUESS:  BlacKkKlansman

 

Best Director: Alfonso Cuaron (Roma)

See, now, I would be fine with Roma winning for Director, because I think Cuaron did a good job, and there are some very well-directed scenes.  And putting the whole thing together should be considered impressive.  It’s just not, in my opinion, a great movie overall.  But it probably took a lot of work to make it.

SECOND GUESS:  Spike Lee (BlacKkKlansman)

 

Best Original Screenplay: The Favourite

I don’t think you nominate a movie for 10 awards and then blow it off for something like this, do you?  GOING WITH MY GUT.

SECOND GUESS:  Green Book

 

Best Adapted Screenplay:  BlackkKlansman

I hope it *at least* gets this, even if the real Ron Stallworth said the movie was kind of inaccurate.  What movie isn’t?!  It’s just a really fast-moving, engaging, well written film.

SECOND GUESS:  A Star is Born

 

Best Actor:  Rami Malek (Bohemian Rhapsody)

As I said earlier, I rented Bohemian Rhapsody recently, and aside from there being some decent Queen karaoke performances, I don’t think Rami Malek did an all that amazing job talking through some really bad fake teeth.  HOWEVER, I was going to go with Bale for that Dick Cheney movie I never saw, but I’m going to go with my gut like I probably should.  I’m getting an Eddie Redmayne vibe here where Malek will probably win despite what I really think/want.

SECOND GUESS:  Christiane Bale (Vice)

 

Best Actress:  Olivia Colman (The Favourite)

That’d be a bummer if they decided to give Glenn Close one of those “she’s overdue for it” BS Oscars for some movie that barely anybody saw that will be forgotten by next year, just because she’s been around forever… because Olivia Colman was legitimately GREAT in The Favourite.  But hey, at least it probably won’t be Lady Gaga.  Silver linings.

SECOND GUESS:  Glenn Close (The Wife) [MAH WIIIIIIIFE]

 

Best Supporting Actor:  Mahershala Ali (Green book)

Eh, I’m fine with him winning this for some movie I never watched, because the guy is an acting treasure, and he’s just about the only thing making season 3 of True Detective pretty good.

SECOND GUESS:  Richard E. Grant (Can You Ever Forgive Me? )

 

Best Supporting Actress:  Regina King (If Beale Street Could Talk)

This was another case where I really wanted to see this movie but it never played at the theater by my house…  Oh well.  I’m sure I’ll rent it one day.

SECOND GUESS:  Rachel Weisz (The Favourite)

 

Best Editing:  BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY

I think the biggest thing I’d give this movie credit for is pretty good pacing, especially for it being so long.  Plus, there’s not a war or action movie nominated this year.

SECOND GUESS:  BlacKkKlansman

 

Best Cinematography:  Roma

High profile and extremely purdy black and white.  Yeah, I’m good with picking this one.

SECOND GUESS:   The Favourite

 

Best Production Design:  THE FAVOURITE

Those castles seemed pretty well decorated.

SECOND GUESS:  Roma

 

Best Costume Design: THE FAVOURITE

You can’t buy those dresses at Walmart.

SECOND GUESS:   Mary Queen of Scots

 

Best Makeup & Hair: VICE

They turned Christian Bale into an evil, chubby, old butthole.

SECOND GUESS:  Mary Queen of Scots

 

Best Foreign Film:  Roma

I mean, isn’t it nominated for 9 more Academy Awards than every other film in this category?

SECOND GUESS:  Does it matter?  Ok, how about Cold War?

 

Best Documentary:  Free solo

This documentary is really awesome, and really scary, and has a ton of actual stakes involved.  It’s just, like, really good.  And really well shot.  I think I was constantly making “wince” faces the whole time.

SECOND GUESS:  Minding the Gap (I also saw this doc and it’s very good, FYI)

 

Best Animated Feature:  Spider-Man: INTO THE SPIDER-VERSE

This movie is legit, and I look forward to watching it again at home whenever it comes out.  And then I’ll force my future kid to watch it, too.  Insane multicolored explosions are good for a baby’s eyes, right?

SECOND GUESS:  Isle of Dogs

 

Best Visual Effects:  AVENGERS: INFINITY WAR

I mean, it’s pretty impressive, and whatnot.  Right?

SECOND GUESS:  First Man

 

Best Sound Editing:  FIRST MAN

THE SOUND EDITING IS NUTS IN THIS MOVIE.  Oops, I didn’t mean to all caps that, but now I think I’ll leave it, it works.

SECOND GUESS:  Bohemian Rhapsody

 

Best Sound Mixing:  BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY

I’m going to go with the music biopic.

SECOND GUESS:  First Man

 

Best Original Score:  Black Panther

Meh, I’ll go with my gut and say that they’ll probably want to acknowledge Black Panther with something, anything, after making a big stink about nominating it for so much…  And this feels like the best bet.

SECOND GUESS:  If Beale Street Could Talk

 

Best Original Song:  “Shallow” (A Star Is Born)

This is a song people listen to.  It sure is.  Me?  No.  I’ve actually never heard it.

SECOND GUESS:  I don’t know, something from Mary Poppins?

 

Best Animated Short:  Bao

I think this is the only one I saw, and it’s Pixar.  That a gut enough reaction for you?

SECOND GUESS:  One Small Step

 

Best Live Action Short:  Marguerite

I read the synopsis for these, and this one seems, uhhhhhh, like it could win?  Sure.

SECOND GUESS:  Detainment

 

Best Documentary Short:  Black Sheep

Seems relevant, I guess?

SECOND GUESS:  Period. End of Sentence.

 

“Wow, those are some great picks, Scott!”  -Scott

2 thoughts on “2019 Dino Bone Oscar Picks

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